Why Are Men Always Thinking About Sex?

by | Aug 17, 2011 | Health & News | 2 comments

Men and women are literally “wired” differently for sex.  For example, eighty-five percent of men ages 20 to 30 have thoughts about sex every 52 seconds… no wonder they can’t remember to take out the garbage!

Women of the same age think about sex about once a day… except at the time of ovulation — the most fertile time — when women think about sex three to four times per day.  Let’s face it, ladies… there’s not a chance we’d be able to keep up with our men in this department.  I’m not suggesting we even try!

What I am suggesting is that we try to become a little more knowledgeable about the fundamental differences between men and women when it comes to sex and libido.  These differences have a definite biological basis, with the dominant sexual hormones, estrogen and testosterone, dictating play.  Simply knowing the following 3 reasons, can go a really long way in better understanding your partner… which ultimately, can lead to a stronger bond.

3 Fundamental Reasons Why Men CAN’T Stop Thinking About Sex 

Reason #1:  SIZE REALLY DOES MATTER: (just not in the body part most people think!)
It’s worth noting that men have 10 to 100 times more testosterone than women, which causes them to be more aggressive and more directed in their pursuits.  This effect of testosterone on a man’s brain occurs very early on in fetal development when a male embryo is exposed to large concentrations of testosterone.  This is why men have 2.5 times greater brain area devoted to sex than women.

So, it is no wonder that men, in general, think about sex much more than women do.  The brain area most responsive to sex hormones is two and a half times larger in men than in women… he simply cannot help himself.

Reason #2:  “WIRED” FOR FOCUS:
Equally important is a man’s ability to focus on one thing at a time.  While women sometimes measure their ‘worth’ in how many different things they can juggle all at once, we need to keep in mind that way WAY back in time, men had to focus on “the hunt” or everyone counting on him to be the provider, could die!  That’s a lot of responsibility to shoulder.  The very survival of a man’s family depended on his ability to be focused on that single task.

So, the next time you get frustrated with your man’s seemingly ‘one-track mind’… remember that he really was “wired” this way for an evolutionary reason.  If that doesn’t work, try picturing him in a loincloth with a five-o’clock shadow and a spear he whittled himself.  If nothing else, this image should bring a smile to your face!

To make this last one more understandable, I like to describe this brain difference to my patients in terms of a light switch vs. a complex control panel. In general, a man can become aroused at just the sight of a woman; his response is triggered like the flip of a light switch. It’s a physical response.

Women, on the other hand, need all of their control panel buttons to be aligned—all gray scales finely tuned and calipers adjusted—to get them to even begin considering sex. By and large, if one little circuit is out of alignment, a woman’s desire is gone, or is at least greatly diminished.

These differences can certainly be frustrating… but imagine for a moment how HE would feel if he actually had to sit down and figure this thing out… let’s all be glad that men ALSO love a challenge!

So, rather than getting annoyed with your man because he always seems to be ready to get intimate… try approaching the topic with a little humor.  Share some of the facts that you’ve learned here and keep those lines of communication open.

It’s important that you can talk about this topic in a way that doesn’t leave either of you feeling uncomfortable or “wrong”.  Who knows… the chuckle you get from this conversation may just put you “in the mood”.

By the way… I would LOVE to hear how this information is helping you.  Please leave me a comment below and be part of the conversation!